Dreams or Messages... You Decide
Laura's Repeating Message
First of All I was almost three when my Gramma Q died. So I don't remember more than images of her. The most vivid memory though is a dream I had after she died. I was in my crib in the apartment we lived in at the time. Another part of my life I don't remember but for the dream. Gramma was in the crib with me. She was laughing happily and I don't know what I was doing. But to this day I firmly believe this was her way of calming her eldest granddaughter's incapability of comprehension. She was telling me everything was alright. And Also to this day I believe the memory still stays wrong as a symbol of the part of her that is always with me.
The room. The door and the window were at opposite ends of the room. It was small. To the right of the door was a wall where my crib was. And for some reason I remember boxes to the left of the door.
Several years later I've been "haunted" or daunted by a couple more significant dreams. (Significant dreams to me are those I remember vividly. I can still picture aspects of the above mentioned dreams and the following remaining dreams)
It happens in my grandparents place. Upstairs at the top of the stairs and to the left there is another set of stairs leading to the attic. As you go up the stairs there is large Window seat to your left. The door before you is an old wooden door with old hinges and a doorstep. The door opens and all I can see is a desk or a table made of dark wood by a low thin window. On the table is a single rose. I get the feeling it has something to do with Gramma Q but I am scared to go inside for fear of what it may indicate or who I may meet. Another significant part is the door opens and swings right but the hinges and handle as the door is closed are the other way around. The Handle is on the right and the hinges are on the left.
I've had this dream twice. Once where I am going up alone and a second time where two of my other cousins (that I rarely see) are trying to get me to explore. A third time previous to the other two I've had a dream with a similar area but the hallway surrounding is darker and the feeling is also darker and scarier. I got the feeling as in most of the dreams that Gramma Q was there just beyond the door. I almost went in the first time but the feelings kept me out. The decor was not the same as Grandpa's house the first time though I associated it with the house. It was almost as if the door was leading to an attic inside the attic.
A fourth dream wasn't the same but similar. I was standing on the stairs but they were longer and there were two windows with windows seat. On the second was a wooden box, which I believe was some sort of music box. On the top left hand corner of the box was a heart shaped picture of me. In the lower right hand corner was a ring with a rose instead of a jewel. Someone, I think it was my uncle said to "take it, It's yours." Also in this dream, later on, we were sitting in the living room and I noticed my grandpa sitting in the chair I usually sit in when we visited. This was weird because it was shortly after he died and I knew he was dead.
A fifth dream unconnected to the attic dreams but still somehow connected, concerns my Grandpa Q. My cousins and I were sitting on a grassy hillside in a downtown area. I looked up and saw my grandpa in a grey suit, pushing a dark blue old fashioned baby carriage. He looked right over at me and I knew he was dead. I remember thinking he must be reliving an instance in his life where he took one of his children to work. I lost sight of him for a moment then noticed he had turned the corner and was walking down the street that ran along side the hillside. This is when I noticed he had no legs.
I believe these dreams are trying to tell me something. The rose is connected to my gramma because she gave me a rose for my second birthday. (She died just before my third birthday).
Note: My Grandpa's legs were failing just before he died, he was confined to his bed.
My pat on the back
Happened just after Fight For Chrystalina was published.
I was sitting in a hall, possibly the back hall at grandma and Grandpa's on a chair. Mom was beside me. There were two book cases in front of me full of the same type of red and brown books. Like encyclopedia. Suddenly Grandpa came around the corner. I started to cry because I knew he was dead and I was desperately trying to write all he was saying to me on a pink piece of paper. He seemed to be trying to give me story ideas. He seemed to be encouraging me. I realized later this was his way of giving his input on my publishing the book.
Warnings not realized
Warning 1 Maiden Name
This dream actually came to my uncle but we didn't realize the significance till later.
My uncle was in a big ware house that was almost empty, except for a big box at one side. His son, Ryn was climbing up to this big box and My uncle was sure the box wouldn't support him. Ryan got in and he fell through the box but when My uncle went to investigate the child before him was not Ryan. A couple of days our grandmother was found dead at her home. We connect this dream to a forecast of her death. It wasn't Ryan the person who died it was "A Ryan". Also significant in this was the colour Yellow and Red. Ryan was wearing red when he fell but when he went to investigate he was either wearing yellow or was covered by a yellow blanket. No idea what this indicates, change in colour possibly leading to the summation that the person who died was not Ryan his son but "A Ryan".
Warning 2... But who was it about?
The significant part of this dream was the second part of a dream. The first part had to do with a basement and ghosts and a dark haired woman who I believe was a ghost/malevolent spirit I never saw her face. The dark hair was the most prominent part with the imposing almost frightening presence. Not quite frightening just a feeling of not wanting to interact with her for fear of what comes next. This dream also had to do with the back yard in part but I'm not sure why. I had a feeling through the majority of the dream I really didn't want to be having this dream. Ryan was a part of this first half but I'm not sure in what way as the first part is not as clear as the second. I made the connection when the second half began in the back of my mind there was some connection with Ryan or he was significant to both halves. Possibility Ryan's mother was the dark haired woman and she and Ryan were a link or just her though Ryan was the part I felt was a significant connection.
In the second part I was standing just at the edge of the hallway at gramma's. Just where the slats were, where I didn't have a clear view of the kitchen. Grandpa (or who I assumed was grandpa) was sitting in his green chair. He didn't quite look like himself. I thought at first it was a younger version but I realize now his face was longer and his hair was styled differently, thinking back it might have been "a grandpa" which I can honestly connect to Ryan's mom's father as well. Suddenly he looked over towards the kitchen. I turned to our cousin B.J. who was sitting on the brown chair and told her to stay put. There were other children in the room (two) but I only registered B.J. t and there was someone in the dining room though I'm not sure who. My Uncle, Ryan's father turned to me and said "She's not your daughter" then turned to Ryan's mom and took Ryan from her and handed him off to Terry and said "Go help Grandma." I looked and who I assumed was gramma was lying in the doorway to the kitchen. What's significant is her face was not clear and I can not be sure it was my gramma. Two people were kneeling by her seemingly trying to find a pulse but not succeeding touching her chin rather than her neck. I'm not sure who it was. I assumed My Uncle, was talking to me and was wondering if I had the skills to help her, (if I had learned CPR yet) though I was pretty sure there was nothing I could do. I got the feeling she was having a heart attack and she was beyond my help. Thinking back now My Uncle, might have been talking to Ryn's mom as he took Ryn away from her. My hesitance could been an indicator that heart attack was not the issue. I assumed it was a heart attack because that's what they declared Gramma had died of. I can't be sure on who exactly My Uncle, was taking to. Finally Ryan was a significant connection to the first part of the dream though I'm not sure why.
Two days later we found out Ryan's mom's mother had a stroke.
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